Mookie says: Fashion is...

R: Are you feeling better now?

Mookie: No, but I faked it for 3 hours
saw 2 shows and went home
took off all the glamour, and might have to put it back on for an hour
R: oh, was it worth it?
Mookie: Yeah, always. Young beautiful boys
are you kidding me?
Plus old, rich drugged men
It's a fabulous cocktail...
add a dozen cameras and some bitchy women
and you have it

Mookie says: Basketball woes

I miss basketball. That was my relationship. We had a good 10 day run, I didn't leave the house, we just messed around 4 hours every night. Now I gotta wait until Thursday and it's killing me.

Mookie says: Spring is turning into summer

I'm bringing back the low-five and the make-out.

Mookie says: I love you goddamnit

Stop this shit, you know I'm yours.

Mookie says: It's coming

Mookie says: I don't wanna text you up

Do you ever talk on that phone...
Or do you just finger it?

Mookie says:

Jim Jones with lipstick?

Mookie says: All Star Weekend

New York has Fashion Week. 

Vegas has Magic.

Every lover has Valentines Day.

But none of it matters.

I'm going to watch basketball until I peuck

Mookie says:

Sometimes we feast

Mookie says: being sixth is like being third twice, Chef Timothy Hollingsworth

Being sixth is really like being third twice.

So let me tell you a little something about being third...

In a recent text convo with fellow fantasy league player who shall remain anonymous, Mookie reflected on the meaning of ranks and has now realized how a certain basketball situation can be just like Timothy's experience at Bocuse d'Or.

Basketball Jones:
P: Nr one in fantasy again
mookie: ooooohhhh

mookie: what's my rank?
P: I will not lose... Nr 3 as always
mookie: hahah!!! Number 3, loyalty before dishonesty, the mookie code of conduct
p: Write it in your blog
mookie: number one and two will destroy each other and out of the smoke the number 3 will conquer all. Mookie through the ruins with sword in hand to triumph the basketball fantasy league and claim the crown!!!!

The moral of the story is: Timothy, Sweden and Norway will kill each other, twice, and you will be number 1. 

So, hey. Mookie salutes.

http://www.bocusedor.com/2009/en/index.php

Mookie says: Welcome the new Royalty, Michelle and Barack Obama

Sometimes America is grand.

Mookie says... fuck on

The institution of morning sex is in shambles. It's a disgrace.
Singles are too busy getting to meetings, taking pills and smiling
between cigarettes, to enjoy the luxury of morning sex.
Couples who aren't equally as obsessed with money, have wiped out the
tradition entirely with a little help from the health craze. Nowadays
you're more likely to do yoga or go jogging than stay in bed for a
second orgasm.
"Real life-livers" stick to shower masturbation. And that's as sexy as
it gets in 2009.

Mookie misses the good old days.

Mookie says: LL

Stands for: Local loving.

I don’t want to be your friend on myspace.
I don’t wanna friend you on facebook. I don’t want you to text me what you had for breakfast and why you have a difficult relationship with your parents and how many cigarettes you smoked at work. I want you to call me when you’re outside. All I want to hear is: hey come down so we can talk.
I don’t want to know you if your area code isn’t 310, 213 or 323.
I want local loving.

New Year, New attitude

Time to stop hating on LA. 

Mookie's resolution is to be positive about the city of Angels.

Everybody needs a little local loving.

Mookie says: Before we go overboard with the love for LA...

Vomit- city.

God peucked suburbs and it became LA.

That's how we know god is Swedish.

the best of 08... more more more

Good riddance Mr. Bush!!

The end of a disgusting era.

Can the world please keep it together for a few more days?

call off the cowards

bombing doesn't solve anything

The best of '08

Mookie says: 

Thanks for making it wild.

Mookie says: What about that Team Spirit?

It's December, 

We're all broke. 

It's either too damn cold or too damn hot.

People are going to split up in a few weeks, 

People are going to want to kill themselves.

Right now, the booze is spilling, and asses are jumping up on xerox machines.

If you ever wanted to fuck that boss... now is the time. 

If you ever wanted to document office mayhem, and family complexities... 

Go get the camera. 

You aren't alone if you feel overwhelmed. 

The team is here.

Breathe.

That's the spirit.

Here at Team Mookie, when the going gets tough, we look at our idol and ask: 

What would BJ Armstrong do?

Life is a fucking roller coaster. The best part is the trip down. 

Put your hands up and enjoy the ride.

Or just chill and eat a cookie.

Mookie says:

Since it became mandatory among idiotic street savvy male morons to provide an "I'm not homosexual" disclaimer before any endearing or observational comments regarding the same sex, the term "no homo", in addition to it's obvious stupidity, has become standard and lame. 

I instead challenge you to take absurdity a step further, by adopting the term "no incest". 

It works well with any comments about relatives. 

For example: Hey sis- I really like that bathing suit- no incest. 

Or: Hey dad - I love your boots - no incest.

Let's make everybody uncomfortable.